"Thank you for calling HP. One of our friendly computer support staff will be with you momentarily." Then I hear on-hold music while I wait and wait and wait. When I finally get to talk to a person, I learn the bad news that I will have to send a computer back a second time because they fixed the wrong problem the first time. I know this is test. Earlier in the day, I gave God permission to stretch me. But I got more aggitated as HP bounced me around from person to person. They told me different things, which only confused the situation. It seems like I spent half of 'my' morning today dealing with problems that were supposed to be fixed last week. At the end of the day, I almost wanted to cry because I felt like I accomplished very little at work.
As I reflect on the situation, I am glad that I didn't really lose my cool on the phone. But I did get agitated and expressed my outrage to others within the office. With each second, the on-hold music became more and more annoying. It seemed like torture. Several times I stopped and said to myself, "I am loved." This truth helps me find my bearing when the trash of life gets too deep. The fact that God loves me, perfects me and empowers me can make anything seem manageable.
My computer nightmare helped me see how my to-do list can weigh me down at work. My self worth sometimes suffers when I feel like I don't achieve my goals and accomplish much during the day. God may have helping me develop patience and meekness on His to-do list while I focus on little things like computers and editorial deadlines. Ultimately, God's to-do list must take precedence.
Losing precious time today at work also showed me how I value time and tend to feel cheated when something places an unexpected demand on it. As a servant of Christ, my time is not mine any more. I serve at the pleasure of the King. The next time that I feel like the circumstances of life are stressing me out, I only need to stop and consider what Christ endured for me on the cross. Everything else seems like a picnic on a beautiful spring day by comparison. In the light of eternity, the problems of today seem like a speck of darkness. The next time that I land in computer hell, all I need to say to myself is, "I am loved."
